Things Only Parents Would Say!


Do you ever say something and then think to yourself "that's something I'd never thought I'd say!"? I think since becoming a mum I have this happen at least once a day, and even more now I've got two little monkeys. I even find myself saying these things in public and not feeling embarrassed one bit.

It definitely seems like it's not only me though! I asked my lovely Facebook followers if they feel the same and wanted to share. Here are just some of their examples:

"Please stop hitting your brother over the head with a cabbage!"

"Which one of you has pooed?!"

"I'm going to the toilet, are you coming?"

"No, we don't eat the cats tail!"

"Stop licking the TV/mirror/window/door/daddy/mummy"

'Please don't lick the bottom of your shoes!!'

"No we don't pick up poo"

"Stop drinking bath water"

"No don't rub your soup in your hair!"

'Darling it would be much better if you didn't eat the fluff off the floor'

"Don't pull your brothers wink!"

"Are you telling a fibaroonie?"

"Do you need a wee?!" - which is then repeated every 2 seconds!

"Why are you licking the sofa?"

"Please don't hit your sister with Peppa Pig!"

I loved reading all of your comments and was giggling for ages, so thank you to everyone who helped out! Do you have any you would add to this list? Tweet me yours with the hashtag #parentphrases and I'll share them!


  1. Loved this! All very true and funny even if we feel quite despairing at the time.
    Sophie x

  2. No, the [insert power tool here] is NOT a toy.
    Get your hands out of your pants at the dinner table.
    I promise you, you will not like Tabasco.


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